As always, here is the recipe for those who don’t like the filler in recipes: Recipe on Mealime. One of the more beautiful people in my life recommended this to me, perhaps with more faith in my culinary abilities than I deserve. She also recommended a spicy saucy side but that seemed Too Much so I decided against it. This optional side is the Spicy Quick Pickled Radishes, within which you can replace the honey with maple syrup if that is your desire. I mean, honey’s not technically vegan, but like, does producing it help bees? Does it help preserve their waning population? My heart says yes but my brain says [citation needed]. As a further note, said beautiful and super cool person keeps bees and they are well-loved and well-cared-for. Buy local.
PLEASE NOTE this recipe says it will take 30 minutes. This is a bold-faced lie and I will not stand for it. Please learn from my mistakes and don’t assume you can get up an hour early before work on Monday morning and make this in an hour tops. Unless you are some sort of neurotypical kitchen deity.
PLEASE ALSO NOTE this recipe provides measurements for a serving of 4. We need a serving of 5, obviously. Also measurements are in cups because obviously everyone knows what cups are???? Just kidding what the fuck is a cup. The following are the portions I used for a serving of 6 because why would I spend energy working out 5 servings? Madness, honestly.
- 300g basmati rice
- 3 crowns of broccoli (crowns as in, you know, the bushels of broccoli that are wrapped in plastic for god knows why come on Tesco sort it out)
- 500g (more or less) cashew nuts (roasted, unsalted; or whatever you can find in the supermarket)
- 3 cloves of garlic (the segments are cloves. i can never remember that)
- a packet of scallions – i took this as an americanism for shallots? so we bought shallots. and i just used one.
- black pepper
- 3 tbsp chilli garlic sauce (or, in my case, sweet chilli sauce and garlic powder)
- pure maple syrup
- 3 tbsp rice vinegar (we found rice wine vinegar, i assume this is the same thing)
- salt
- sesame seeds
- toasted sesame oil (we just got sesame oil?? probably doesn’t matter)
Some notes on the recipe
- As mentioned before, the recipe says it takes 30 minutes. While, yes, the actual cooking takes about half an hour, this doesn’t account for pulling together the pure strength to get out of bed, getting everything together, making a quick breakfast, chopping broccoli while shovelling muesli into your maw, cooking and chopping and what have you, cleaning up, quietly sobbing, and washing up. I got up an hour early to attempt this, taking the “30 minutes! uwu” as gospel but allowing an extra half an hour for my usual dilly-dallying, googling what the fuck a cup is again, and general lack of cooking smarts. 90 minutes later, I was maniacally washing up, weeping internally, and wishing I hadn’t let my brain keep me in bed all evening once again.
- My rice burned because I a) didn’t put enough water in maybe and 2) should have used a bigger pot. Always use a bigger pot.
- I asked my poor ever-suffering mother to shop for the ingredients for me while I lay in bed feeling sorry for myself. She had a bad time, I had a bad time by proxy, and shopping was, all in all, a bad experience. So, if there’s anyone you particularly dislike or anyone who has irritated you recently, ask them to do the shopping for you.
- The sauce doesn’t seem like enough. If you like your food more moist than, say, a camel’s arse, then make extra sauce.
The Verdict
Day One: Monday
So, I hear you ask, was all that kerfuffle worth it? Well, dear reader, I can with honesty and authenticity tell you that yes, it was worth it. Sure, it could do with a bit more sauce on the greens, and I skipped the dusting of sesame seeds so perhaps I’m missing out on that extra cronch, but the sauce is lovely and the cashews add a great texture. The portion didn’t seem all that generous, but I found myself reaching my food capacity towards the end (in a good way, not an oh-god-if-i-finish-this-some-of-it-may-come-straight-back kind of way). Although in appearances it looks like the kind of meal that springs to mind for non-vegans: plain rice, a bunch of veg, some nuts – its taste isn’t bland and I find myself looking forward to tomorrow’s helping.
Day Two: Tuesday
I accidentally left this in the microwave overnight so I had hoped that hadn’t affected anything. I mean, it smelled alright, looked alright, and when I ate it at lunch, tasted alright. So I assume it’s alright. Still love the taste, still think it could do with a bit more sauce. I did also find I was hungrier in the afternoon than I was during Week One’s Mujaddara, so perhaps more cashews should be used, or kept aside as a mid-afternoon snack.
A series of unfortunate events…
…meant that I was ill for the remainder of the week – I believe unrelated to the food I cooked! But perhaps something to be aware of. It certainly didn’t feel like food poisoning, and may be my body struggling to get used to this new diet so soon after stuffing my face at Christmas. But I digress. On to Week Three.
Got any suggestions for future meal prep recipes? Please do let me know in a comment!
I like recipes that a) require very minimal/simple cooking, b) use a small budget, and of course c) are vegan!
The Lazy Vegan 